Availability: Make Yourself...

With 2012 coming to a quick close, I've had time to reflect upon relationships.  They can be friendly, loving, weird, crazy, but a relationship all the same.  I've "met" wonderful people in my online communications.  Some I've actually met and befriended offline.  For example, the terrific friends I've had the honor of meeting from The Flat Earth Society.  Creative, funny, adventurous.  Brings all the good out of me. 

And then there's all of you from Facebook and Twitter.  Getting to know some of you through your discussions and images have been very rewarding.  I've learned a great deal from you, and when you pop onto my page just to leave a smile or wave hello?  Makes me happy!

Family and friend interactions in real-time are to be cherished.  You never know what the future has to hold, and like I mentioned from the Spittin' Kitten, tomorrow is promised to no one.  I say this because of a few interactions (or non-interactions, so to speak) from the winter of 2011 to 2012.  We make ourselves available for people or things we find important.  There are those that choose to be "elsewhere;" checking out from interacting with a particular person or not attending a certain gathering for whatever reason they have.   

I say, "Let it go!"  No need to analyze why you don't want to be available; just move on.  Clear your mind of any real or perceived encumbrances which keep you from being there with that certain person.  Negative emotions are very destructive to not only your mental state, but your spiritual one, too.  Breath and let go.

Always remember, tomorrow is not promised to anyone.  My hope for everyone is that they are true to themselves, be where you want to be, and gently bless those you choose to leave behind. 

Simple.

rainwriter jones

Not-So-Intimate Apparel (Pajama-Jammas)

A few days ago, I sat in my truck just before lunch time.  To my chagrin, I see yet another pajama'd individual strutting into a grocery store like nothing was wrong.  PAJAMAS!!!  Outside the home AND in the middle of the day, mind you!  You might think me strange, but it makes me sad to see this trend of wearing intimate apparel outside the home.  There's a reason why it's called "intimate."  No one's supposed to see you wearing these items unless they are familiars.

But to me, it goes beyond a poor clothing choice.  It denotes a laziness; a devil-may-care attitude towards the world.  I liken it to the horrible trend of people wearing drooping pants and thongs (both men and women bearing their bottoms).  I'm sure these pajama-jammas fall straight out of bed, unshowered, and head out into the community at large. Yes, indeed.  The very fabric of society is becoming threadbare. 

To me, this lack of grooming signifies a great decline in sensibilities.  Every time I see nightclothes in public, I shudder.  By far, I certainly am not a prude.  My concern is that this is a reflection of where we are headed:  People who don't give a damn about anything.  A lack of seriousness regarding life in general.  We're headed down a road to which the end is dismal.  This kiss-my-ass-ness must end!

Put on some PROPER clothes...

rainwriter jones

The Benji Affects -- Revisited (Again)

When It Rains:  It Rains Bullets

I tell you, wonders never end!  In previous posts I've made mention of the North Point Bar and Grill and all the violence that goes with it.  I felt pretty good when there seemed to be a concerted effort to end the gun violence by closing at 10 p.m. (just before the REAL knuckleheads come out). 

With disdain, I watched as the closing time became later and later.  I knew they were tempting the fates with this idiotic effort to make a few more bucks at the expense of sleeping children and working adults alike.  A few hours again it happened.  Yet another shooting across the street.  I was stirred by the sound of yelling at 1 p.m.  What the f*ck, what are they still doing open?" was my thought.  Shades of months prior, the arguing could result in gunfire, so I fully awakened to listen for shots.

Peeking out the blinds (to the side of the glass, mind you).  With the "Open" sign dark, the parking lot still has cars.  I see a male enter, exiting his car over and over again.  Finally with the last exiting, there it was.

POP, POP, POP, POP!!!!

Here we go again.  These folks don't ever learn.  The later they close, the more likely gun violence will occur.  Homedude shot out the front door glass of the bar.  Who knows why, but does that make a difference?  He could have hit anyone in the vicinity.  I'm not so much concerned about the patrons of the bar because the know the risks associated with going into this particular establishment.  It's the innocent bystanders which get caught up in this nonsense.  Those who are not involved in the mindset of those who carry weapons for "protection" that eventually fire them because they were available when they snapped.

Come on, Puyallup Tribe!  Stick to an earlier closing time so that those would commit crimes in our community will be elsewhere.  Making your establishment a choice location for these criminals is in itself criminal!


rainwriter jones

The Benji Effects: Revisited

Do you remember a few posts back wherein I used the term "Benji Effects" to refer to any activity in which people engage that is meant to have a positive result even though the person/people performing such an activity know damn well that it AIN'T gonna work?  Well, as predicted, The North Shore Bar and Grill are back up to their old antics! 

A few coats of paint and a new closing time of 10 p.m. change nothing when the same tomfoolery that prompted these changes re-occur.  The "business as usual" mentality and "private" parties that appear to have extended closing hours have resulted in the first tribal police intervention in weeks.  Though whatever happened was dealt with quickly, the troubling fact that there are times when there are patrons in the bar WAY past 10 p.m. (i.e., 10:45 p.m. - 12 a.m. or even later) is definitely a recipe for another shooting. 

The idiots which frequented this spot had moved to a BBQ place about a mile from here and within a few weeks of their presence, one man was dead and several shot.  Don't know who took over the place, but it is now a Bavarian beer joint.  They've made a definitive decision not to have violence in their establishment by not encouraging the type of gun-totting fools to patronize their business.  Sorry, but lets face it.  Businesses which serve alcohol and play rap/hip-hop music tend to bring out the worse in folks.  It's quite unfortunate as these genres of music are not really the culprit:  It's the people that seem to think it's a cultural thing to listen to it AND carry guns that are the problem.  But I can't change their attitude; just try to protect myself, my family, and my neighbors from the deadly end result. 

Wake up, bar keeps!  As long as you continue to entertain the Bongo Boys, you'll always have the possibility of trouble.  But I don't think it matters much to them as they don't live directly across the street from the front line. 

rainwriter jones 

Near Orgasm: Fumbling With Zippers and Other Such Naughties

As of late, my husband and I have enjoyed sitting outside watching traffic pass.  The bar and grill across the street have made extreme changes to their property and business which affords us the benefit of relaxing out front without the threat of being shot.  Yesterday as we sipped a little and chatted more, we noticed a couple across the street in the side parking lot.  They were hugged up on each other REAL CLOSE LIKE, but I figured they were just snuggling.  I've seen these two before in the same parking lot doing the same thing.  This time was different.  As we watched, the man slipped his hands into her pants!  Yes, in broad daylight, this fellow was masturbating this chick!  I'm like, DAMN!  These two are freaks!



Okay, I'll admit we did stay seated.  (lol)  There was another man standing in front of the smoke shop for the longest time.  I later figured out he was watching the show, too.  After several minutes of pressing, poking, and stroking, this couple decided to finish up in her green truck.  I see heads go up; I see heads go down.  In the meantime, a young woman came out from the bar  to take a look by creeping over and peeking into the cab.  She eased back into the building, just to re-appear with the entire bar!  The audience for this lurid couple was complete.  When they noticed that they'd been spotted, homedude jumped from her truck, climbed into his car, and they left the parking lot going separate directions.  At this point, we're laughing our asses off at this spectacle.  "Bravo!!" we yelled.  (LMBAOOO)  Lawd have mercy!  Reminded me of the good ole' days.  ;-)



Then I thought about my younger self, and the risk taking behaviors of which I had engaged regarding sex.  Needless to say, obvious these two were exhibitionists, and were lucky that no one called law enforcement on them.  Many of us have been involved in sexual activity in public in one way, shape, or form.  Heavy petting in theaters, necking in the car, downstairs at Mom's (tee-hee-hee), but I have never publicly had sex for the entire community to watch.  Wow!  *eyes bulging*

It might behoove these young lovers to get a room, or at least find a darkened alley somewhere.  I certainly did!  (LMBAOOOOO)

rainwriter jones

Return of the Bongo Boys (at the North Shore Bar and Grill)

I saw them dance in the freshly paved parking lot.  Shirts pulled off, blows struck, cussing, and yes, even a smoke break between swings.  And then a resumption of the battle between two Bongo Boys while their homies and bystanders looked on.  They exchange blows amongst fancy cars, oblivious to the spectacle of which they were creating.  Or were they?  My thoughts are that they didn't care.  A MAJOR problem!

There's been several incidents at this location in which there has been disturbances which range from noise nuisances, gunfire, and murder.  Yesterday was a true testament that you can't put perfume on a turd!  This latest incident happened in broad daylight in the middle of a busy parking lot FULL of cash-paying patrons.  What was so interesting is that these individuals felt perfectly at ease in that parking lot:  As if claiming it as their territory.  I watched from my parking lot as they eased into both the smoke shop and the bar when the police arrived as if nothing was wrong. 

And still another incident which went unreported:  A verbal altercation between three females and a male at 1 a.m.  As the male crossed the street, words were exchanged with the three females.  God only knows what this sh*t was about.  When they wake up from their drunken stupors this morning, they probably won't even realize that they had a fight.  Just to return tonight to start the same dysfunction business all over again.   

From my little view on their world, I shake my head.  I can only wonder what type of childhood these folks had wherein they think it perfectly fine to hang out in parking lots; cause disturbances; be lawless.  These are National Geographic moments.  It's hard to think of these unruly paying or non-paying patrons as humans any more.  Specimens for observation through my blind slats. 

No, you cannot put perfume on a turd.  All the beautification projects around the property mean nothing when these individuals are allowed to cause problems for the tax-paying citizens in our neighborhood.  As a landlord, I know that to create a rodent-free house for a future tenant, you need to leave it vacant for at least two months.  To remove these pests, this establishment should be closed so that these imbeciles can find other places to create their special brand of mayhem.

But, these words may be falling on deaf ears.  So, I'll continue to blog, and peek through my blind slats.


rainwriter jones

The Bongo Boys: Gun Violence at the North Point Bar and Grill

Gun fire. Again. Last night I witnessed what had to have been the most ignorant display in quite some time at the North Shore Bar and Grill. Just prior to closing, some idiot shot 8-9 rounds in the parking lot. I watched folks scramble to their cars (almost hitting pedestrians trying to flee). Others ran for cover inside the darkened building. I stood and watched as I saw cars return AFTER the shooting. Why would they return? One car in particular parked on the curb outside the establishment. I figured he would pick up an associate who he left behind when he fled. But no! After a full 10 minutes of sitting there, he revs his motor and bolts into the parking lot. I think the onlookers recognized him as the shooter, and ran back into the bar. He continued to jam on the accelerator, smash on the brake: Trying to intimidate those he held captive. By this time, I was on the phone calling 911. Don't you know by the time three police agencies responded, this dummy was STILL in the area? I could hear the cops tell him to drop his gun. Yes, a busy night! I could see the police searching the lot for shell casings by flashlight. What a waste of resources. Is this the new "culture?" You have dangerous people who carry weapons (for protection, they claim), and those who live dangerously that hang around for the fashion of it all. I've looked across the street at the patrons of this establishment. Young girls in tight dresses drunker than hell, young mothers who've left their children unattended so that they can party (drunker than hell), young men with loud stereos and mouths boasting this, that, and the other (drunker than hell). This type of behavior is quite troubling to me. I sleep within feet of this parking lot. There may come a day I won't be here to post anything because I would have died while lying in bed from being shot. To die in this manner is not my plan, but who knows what the fates hold for me. I cannot understand how this neighborhood nuisance is allowed to continue business. How many "incidents" does it take to finally shut this place down? How many have to die? Is there a quota? Will me or mine have to be killed before the powers that be FINALLY close this place? Needless to say, I'll start my cammpaign to clean up my neighborhood tomorrow. Enough is enough! I think the worst part of this mess is that the people that frequent this dive don't even live in the area. They come into OUR neighborhood to disrupt: Even kill. And this morning, I watch the bees return back to the hive. Some to the smoke shop, others to collect the belongings left behind in their exodus. They'll be back after the hose stops spraying the water: Drinking, fighting, shooting... rainwriter jones

I'm in Love With a Criminal Mind (and other thieving magpies)

the future Mr. B by rainwriter jones

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A few days ago, I sat in a secluded section of a K-Mart parking lot eating a fish filet sammich and fries (of which I haven't had in GRIPS of time). As I munched on my sammich, I spy a bee buzzer cruising around where I was parked. Now mind you, this is the middle of the day, and there were several other exits homedude could have chosen to leave, but he had to slowly pass my truck. Why? He scoped my vehicle for some sort of criminal act. Be it lifting my wheels, or stealing it in it's entirely and selling it piece by piece.

"Not today, you m*thaf*cka," is what I mouthed as he rolled away. "You've got to find another victim this time, a**hole!" (LMBAO)

There's been much more crime than usual lately. Lots of homedudes roaming the streets, prowling houses and cars. Sometimes I wish we had a system featured in the "Superman" movie wherein a tribunal convenes, sentences the criminals, and then ships them in a translucent spacecraft hurled into space. Unfortunately, these thugs live amongst us, so I feel the need to dissect their lifestyle, and how they came to being useless vagrants.

At the university, I enjoyed taking classes which studied sociopathic behavior. Petty thievery wasn't often the topic of discussion, but I find this even more interesting because it is far more prevalent than the stories which are sensationalized in the news. Where does it all start? This feeling that what's mine is mine, and what's yours is mine?

I would think it begins in the formative years. I can't say only children who had a dysfunctional home life are involved in criminal activity as it crosses all socio-economic lines. I know of a family in which there were five boys. The mother was one hell of a bad influence (i.e., stealing and substance abuse), and four out of five of the boys turned out to be productive citizens. Go figure! But for some reason, the one child became a habitual drug abuser and petty thief. Why? I'm not sure. Maybe he's "hard-wired" for crime?

In this point in my life, I can sit back and chuckle. I think it more hilarious than aggravating. Just sit back: Analyze: Watch them slow-roll me as I eat my fish filet sammich! You might nick me tomorrow, but not today! (LMBAOOOOOO)

rainwriter jones

DTF? WTF!

A few days ago, I indulged myself to an episode of "Jersey Shore." I thought it would be interesting to see what young folk call entertainment these days. So, as I'm watching yet another scantily-clad bimbo strut through yet another drinking hole, one of them says to an intoxicated male, "Me and my friends are DTF!" DTF? WTF is that (I ponder). I ask my daughter and she informed me that was an acronym for "down to fuck." EWWWW! Are you joking? Nope, she was dead serious. And don't you know, those chicks went back to their pad and screwed them??? What makes it even worse is that this here Black lady in the Pacific Northwest saw them acting slutty? I wonder if their parents know of their risky behavior?

And then I started to think the world is going to hell in a hand basket. I know that back in the day, we would have sex with dudes, but did make such a big announcement that we were receptive females. (LMBAO) I know there's been premaritial sex since the beginning of time, and that marriage is a manmade institution, but damn! To be so brazen is way over the top!

Is it better to be subtle in your sexual pursuits? Or just be straight forward and say, "Hey, let's fuck?" Good question. I'll let you answer it.

rainwriter jones

When All Else Fails: Get Moving!

rusty wrench by rainwriter jones

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Recently, I decided to update my LinkedIn profile. It sat there fairly stagnant, and I had been encouraged by one of my friends to finally flesh it out. Placing the details of my educational and employment background made me somewhat reflective. I saw the road on which I traveled to get where I am today.

Being quite a dogmatic person, I'm never satisfied with not completing a task to which I set my sights. I started at the University of Washington after taking a quarter break after high school. I didn't have the benefit of being "brainy," nor were my parents rich. Tuition was low, so I could afford to pay it with the little money I made as an employee in dietary services at the university's hospital. Well, the low tuition was short-lived and seeing as though I didn't received any grants or scholarships, I had to stall my education at the university, and go to a lower-cost community college. After obtaining my certificate in word processing, I found a job at two word processing departments. I was allowed to continue my university education while working at the latter insurance brokerage firm. I was very fortunate they allowed me this privilege!

So yes, it took me 8 years to complete a 4-year degree, but it was well worth it. From there, I obtained my nursing license, and I plan to continue furthering my knowledge base.

Today it is so much tougher to go the route that I did. With towering tuitions costs, the powers that be don't understand (or care) that it's harder to get educated. Like me, not everyone can get scholarships, grants, or loans. But sometimes you've just got to dig your heels in and do what it takes to complete the task before you. Take two jobs (three if you must): Just get it done!

I guess you don't need a high IQ to be sucessful: Just determined!

rainwriter jones

Stingy Ex-Boyfriends and the Feline Connection

lounging Felix by rainwriter jones

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Last night, I watched my cat Felix attempt to lie in my lap. As I continually waved him off, he changed his direction in an effort to gain lap access. For some reason, it reminded me of one my ex-boyfriends: A selfish slip of a man who only had his own best interest at heart. That was to get what he wanted no matter if it was good for me.

We'll just refer to him as "B." He was a real piece of work. A self-serving troll that floated back and forth between me and the future mother of his child. I don't know if he ever married her, but I do recall an awkward moment of being at my friend's house for a barbeque with my present-day husband, and seeing him and his quite pregnant, pig-faced woman walking up the lawn. I also remember seeing his sorry ass on the 5 o'clock news. At that time he worked for a car dealership, and there was a dispute over medical insurance.

My main problem with him is this: He was a LOUSY lover! I guess I can't really call him a lover; just a sex partner. He always thought of himself, with his no pleasure-providing self. The type to have "his," and then not only roll over without providing "mine," but take the blanket, too! There's something about a man/woman who doesn't pleasure his/her partner that can equate to an all-around inconsiderate person.

Yes, I've thought of him recently, and why I subjected myself to such torment. One thing I know for sure is that he provided me with the information I needed to choose someone special. A person who not only thought about himself and his needs, but what I needed or better yet: Desired. He was just a cog in the wheel of relationships, and a much-needed lesson on how not to find yourself saddled to such a brute on a long-term basis.


My thoughts are these:

1. If he/she rolls over after sex, they're not for you.

2. If he/she floats endlessly between you and another sex partner, they're not for you. (unless both of you are into that). (lol)

3. If he/she chooses an ugly girlfriend/boyfriend instead you, they DEFINITELY aren't for you!

4. And definitely, very definitely, if he/she doesn't satisfy you sexually NEVER EVER MARRY THEM!


I'm of the mind that a gratifying sex life is essential to a good relationship. If one partner is not happy, the other wouldn't be, either. But that is only me. There are others who choose to live a life of abstinence. To each his/her own. But if, and only if, your partner doesn't require physical satisfaction, too.

So what does this have to do with my cat? That's a good question. Maybe it was because it wasn't a reciprocal relationship. He would have gotten a warm lap, and I might have gotten flies? (LOL) Oh well. He didn't get my lap, and I didn't get a lap full of fur.

And no, I'm not lying. His lady did look like a pig!

rainwriter jones

The Professor, Lithium, and the Jade Stalk

(should sex NOT be this big ass mystery?)


It's always interesting when parents decide to tell their children about sex (if they do). I guess some children will learn from osmosis? When I got my first period, my Mother gave me a "care kit" which included one horrible strap-on Kotex and a booklet on human reproduction. "If you have any questions, feel free to ask me," was about all I got in terms of sex education, but at least it was something. I had early lessons in terms of learning how things really were beyond the safety of my parent's door. They were invaluable lessons for someone like me who developed at such a young age.

I do not think my Mother understood how really bad it was out there. For some reason, we Black girls stuck together. We knew to be the most cautious of those who others trusted: Our teachers. My first experience with inappropriate behavior was with one of my elementary school instructors. Though without any previous sexual experience, I knew his proximity and touches were unsuitable, that his requests for me to stay after school were not to be heeded. He had the nerve to have a sleep-over at his house. NONE of the Black girls went. We just knew this dude had some really bad intentions.

The predators which continually attempted to lure us into their cars on our way to school? Classic.

And then there were the high school instructors. The librarian who continually made sex jokes. I remember his eyes all goopy with some sort of discharge, and me begging my friend to sit with me during my T.A. period. He was one sick puppy!

I once had a chemistry teacher that was more hilarious than freakish. Nothing offensive with him. He'd teach the class from behind his lab table, blah-blah-blah. One day we were almost asphyxiated by him taking lithium from its oil suspension, putting it on a paper towel vowing it can be exposed to oxgyen for a few minutes without igniting, and then watching it ignite after 30 seconds. Worst still was him immersing the flaming mineral in water, and choking on the billowing smoke which resulted. Yes, he was fairly daffy. It was just funny in that I don't think he realized what he brought back from Japan. What I first thought were salt and pepper shakers were actually ceramic penises. They were removed the next day.

Let alone college professors trying to exchange grades for sex.

With all this said, you'd think in this day and age that children would be told about the birds and bees. It amazed me to learn how a 17 year old girl in this area was coaxed by a college music professor to take off her clothes and masterbate in front of him. He told her he was doing a study on sexual arousal and how it affected vocal performance. She said he told her that this would make her be able to reach lower octaves while singing. Was she naive? Or sheltered by her parents? If she knew this man was attempting to take advantage of her, it might have spared her the memory of acting so idiotically.

So what's the point to all this? Not discussing sex in at least it's basic form suits no purpose other than leaving your children open to any predator that may pop up. They won't have the knowledge in which to compare their information given to them from a trusted source against what some predator might be saying. Just tell them the basics, and sprinkle in a little worldly-type scenarios. It just may save you and them from a lifetime of regrets.

rainwriter jones